Mothering can be lonely.
It is so important for us to find a community so our days as mom are not lonely. The biggest issue I had finding community was most of the groups I went to choose a parenting style much different than my own. This is not to say how they parented was wrong...it was just different. And so I found a lot of the times I had very little in common with them and did not feel comfortable discussing the issues which were important to me (and believe me I tried a few times, but each time I became the two headed mom in the room and no other mom could understand where I was on my journey.)
So, I struggled for a few months, going to different groups, trying to find the community I was looking for. I knew it was out there, or at least it was in my treasured magazine Mothering. Each month I would anxiously await the arrival of Mothering magazine...these mothers were the mothers I needed to connect with. Unfortunately, they were spread out across the US and Canada. But, one day I found what I was looking for. I was searching online and found a Natural Parenting Meet Up group in my community. Finally, a community of like minded moms to share with, learn from and give and get support. This group did not last long as a Meet Up group, but the group of moms, now friends, I met has lasted. We have developed friendships, our kids still play together and we share many of the same parenting ideals. It took time, it took going to many different groups and it took me listening to my instinct to keep looking for what I needed as a mom – the community of like minded moms I could share my journey with.
Recently, I found another group, The Thoughtful Parent (doesn’t that name just give you the chills, it did to me the first time I heard it). This group is lead by a homeopathic doctor and meets every two weeks for discussions on anything to do with natural, attachment, holistic parenting. I went this morning for the second time and it was just amazing. To be in a room with moms and babies who understand me as a mother, well, I LOVE it!
The group meets in a yoga studio. We get the yoga mats and pillows out, we sprawl out on the floor, the kids play and we chat. We chat about the things which interest me the most as a mom – healthy eating, healthy kids, natural parenting, alternative health care, attachment parenting, baby wearing, breastfeeding, and so on. There are experienced moms with older children and new moms with newborns and together we share, chat, learn and grow.
Finding community for me was a challenge, but a challenge I never gave up on. I knew it was out there, I just had to keep looking. Choosing to mother in a way which is different than the norm is not easy, I struggle often with comments, questions, looks and misunderstanding. Knowing I have a wonderful group of mom friends and a new group of like minded mamas at The Thoughtful Parent makes those misunderstood moments completely disappear.