Monday, September 16, 2013

Choosing Motherhood


I have called myself by many names in the past...dance teacher, triathlon coach, conditioning coach, personal trainer, sports nutritionist, holistic nutritionist, writer, doula and finally mother. When Reece was first born people would ask what I did, I would answer that I was a nutritionist. After a few years the answer was nutritionist, writer and doula. But lately the answer is simply mother.

The last few years have seen a shift in my work schedule. Some of that shift has been by choice, some of it circumstance, but whatever the reason it has been a shift I have welcomed.

You see being a mother is all I want. Being with my little man, enjoying him and his journey, seeing life through his eyes and experiencing motherhood to its fullest extent is where my heart is. It is only recently I have come to this full realization. As things have shifted over the last few years, as work slowed down, life took me on a different course. A course of learning to live with less, of being very careful with our budget, of living life with what we have and reassessing whether we need or want the things we are buying. It is different to live life this way, it is sometimes a struggle, and it creates a strength in us I could never have imagined. It is powerful and constantly has us looking at our life and assessing what is working and what is not.

As I have stepped fully into motherhood with my entire being, I am at peace. I am happy to answer the question what do you do with a response of  "I am a mother". It if fulfilling to me on so many levels and brings much light and love to my days.

Yes, some of those days are not easy. Living on one income, struggling with bills, but at the end of each day there is a long list of gratitude. I sit with that gratitude and I smile. Yes, life could be completely different if I stepped out of our home and worked, but it is not a life we, as a family, want. This is our life, we are living it, full on and even though there are days we might question our sanity in regards to this decision, at the end of the day we are happy, we have all the things we need and we are surrounded by wonderful people, both family and friends. What more could we ask for?

So I am choosing motherhood as I move forward on my journey. It may be something you already knew, but it has taken me awhile to come to the full realization that this is what I have been choosing over the last few years. And maybe, it has taken me this long to be okay with that.

Joining Lydia

35 comments:

  1. I am so happy for you. What a beautiful journey, and they grow so quickly you have to really soak it in.

    "Mother" is the most important job in the world, it doesn't get enough recognition.

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    1. Thank you Jennifer. This whole journey is moving much too quickly for my liking and I am looking forward to soaking in as much of it as I can.

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  2. Simply wonderful- I think what you wrote so many of us feel. Your words are empowering to us mothers who chose that willingly - and enjoying the best time of our lives. My kids mean everything to me and with 4- there is a very tight budget...but they are my riches :)

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    1. Thank you. And yes, such riches they are :)

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  3. Each woman has to make a very personal choice and for me it was being a sahm and I would never ever trade one minute of it. I sit here missing my kids at times but I look back and see what I was lucky to do with them and yes on one income-invaluable memories :)

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    1. And such a difficult one. Sitting here right now, I know this is the best choice for Reece and for us as a family. Hard on one income, but we will do it.

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  4. I couldn't agree more! I totally can relate to what you are saying in this. There are struggles and sacrifices, but ultimately the simple path is a path of peace. Enjoy your journey with Reece, you are blessed and I am so happy to "know" you. :)

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    1. I knew you would :) Thank you, and I happy to know you as well Tiffany xo

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  5. What a lovely phrase...stepping into motherhood with your entire being. Just beautiful. And so very important to our children.

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  6. This is really lovely Kim! I can totally relate to the struggles of one income and the choice to step out of the "working world" to focus on things at home. I often question the sacrifices.
    Thank you for sharing this.

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    1. Thank you Dawn. There has been a lot of soul searching around here, really digging deep to make tough decisions about what I/we want for our future. I know moving forward it won't be easy, but in the end it will all be worth it.

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  7. A beautiful and graceful piece, Kim. I am so happy for you - knowing yourself fully, accepting everything and embracing it all. You truly inspire.

    xo

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  8. That's a great choice, so generous for your little man and family, and also, with the words you use, I can feel that's all a journey to become aware of it and in perfect peace with it, and those words were important to share, important for me to read them, thank you a lot Kim!

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    1. My pleasure, it has been quite a journey just getting to this place and a long one at that, but I am finally at peace with it and know it is the right thing for our family.

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  9. I think being a sahm is the best job ever and one you will never regret Kim.
    I have always been home with my babies, and while there have been times when it's been a financial struggle, we have always managed and life has been good.
    Babies grow up really fast and then there is still time to go out in the world if you want to.

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    1. Thanks Tracey. It definitely won't come without struggles, but like you said it will be worth it.

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  10. I love being a mom too. And taking on as my full time occupation was so important to me too. That's part of the reason we couldn't stay in France. I would have had to get a full time job.

    I'm so happy you have found peace in letting the other things go. It makes the job so much easier when that is your only focus.

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  11. I'm very happy that you feel such a peace... I totally get this shift, the acceptance, the embracing--(it evolves in us, doesn't it?) I need to let go of more and embrace the mothering, b/c it is much more peaceful when we do that. xo

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    1. Yes, it does evolve. I never thought I would come to a place like this, it has been an interesting shift and I am happy to now fully embrace it.

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  12. You are truly inspiring. I hope more and more moms will learn to embrace their entire being like you. I believe the struggle is coming from with in for most moms,especially newly ones, making it a hundred times harder to find inner peace.

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    1. Thank you, your words mean a lot. Definitely an internal struggle for many moms, I am sure.

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  13. What a wonderful sentiment... hitting my heart closely since my husband and I are evaluating my "need" to go back to work next year when my littlest turns 1. You inspire me to try and make it work... Thank you for sharing your journey.

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    1. I will admit, it isn't easy, but so far we have seen nothing but benefits from it. Yes, the financial hit is the hardest to deal with, but we both feel okay taking that hit in order to live this life we are leading. Good luck as you explore your options.

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  14. Kim, this is such an IMPORTANT post. I have tears in my eyes. As you know I have been at home full time with my boys and we have also educated them at home instead of sending them to school. Being with my boys full time is what I have done and this is what I have wanted to do. Due to little comments from others and possibly from my own self doubting thoughts, I have at times felt that I wasn't doing enough. Not that I wasn't busy with my boys because I was and I still am. To be honest, most days I work my butt off. It all came down to the fact that I haven't been earning money. BUT in my heart, I know I'm doing the right thing for our family, myself and my boys. It has been hard at times, but I am so pleased I have done what I felt in my heart that I needed to do. Another thing....I have been trying to start up my health coaching business, but I am struggling to find the time. Even though my boys are now 13 and 15, as a homeschooling mum, they still need a lot of my time. I know my time left with them living at home is going to come to an end one day and I want to make the most of every single moment that I have left. Thank you Kim for writing such an important post. xxoo

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    1. Self doubt, that little voice inside of us that always makes us question ourselves. I have to admit there has been a lot of questioning here as I came to this realization, and I am sure there will be more.

      Following our hearts isn't always easy, but when it is the right thing it feels pretty darn good, and I am happy you followed yours Julie. Like you said it was right for you, your family and your boys. I can imagine that time for a mom, no matter how hold your children are, is always at a minimum, they will always need us, just in different ways.

      Enjoy every moment with you boys Julie, they are very lucky to have you xo

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  15. Oh this is such a great post and I wish I had time to write more. We have chosen the importance of having one of us home to guide Iz over having more money and while it is a struggle financially we know it is worth it every day. I am so proud of you and so happy for you for claiming the best job title of all..."mother". You're incredible. <3

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    1. Thank you Sara. Struggles for sure, but like you said so worth it.

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