Monday, July 4, 2016
Yesterday marked nine months since my marriage ended, and while I didn't mark the occasion in any way, I did take a few moments to reflect. The last nine months have definitely been challenging....finding my way as a single homeschooling mama, figuring out the best way to run my little homestead on my own, determining how best to earn an income and still live the life that feels right and authentic for me, and so much more. It has stretched me, forced me to think outside the box, and in some ways, allowed me to become more of the person I want to be.
Remaining true to who I am in all of this has been important to me. This kind of thing can make you angry, bitter and resentful, and it would be easy to fall into those feelings and emotions, but they don't serve a purpose, at least not for me. Yes, in those initial days I can whole-heartedly say I moved through those emotions, but the key was I moved through them. I didn't let them become part of me. Instead I acknowledged them, let them sit with me for a bit and then released them. That process allowed me to move forward from a place of calm and peace, it allowed me to see a new path ahead, and it allowed me to set new goals for the future. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't an easy process, and there were many days I questioned the path ahead, and my ability to carve out a life for Reece and I that would hold true to who I am, but I can stand here now, and say I am doing it. Even with all the ups and downs, and the negative cloud that at times hung over my head, I remained positive, I chose to see the good in my life, and I offered gratitude every single day for the simple things in my life that were going right. Because even in the darkest days there was always something to be grateful for.
Reflection has been a big part of the last nine months, and I am sure it will continue to be as I move forward. Life is full of lessons, and in reflection, I am finding my lessons in all of this. Some of those lessons have been easier than others, but they have all helped me grow into a stronger, happier and more content person today. In essence, they have brought me to this moment right now, a moment in which life is moving forward, with me in control, and that feels pretty darn good.
Life is never easy, it is an adventure of the most daring kind. There will always be obstacles to overcome, but we can, and will get through it. It isn't always pretty, as I have discovered, but we get through it, one step at a time.