Every year at Reece's birthday celebration I share a birthday story. In the story the child comes down to earth from heaven on the rainbow bridge to meet his parents. Reece has always enjoyed the story, but this year he really seemed to take it in a little deeper then in years past. It was interesting for me to watch his facial expressions as I told it, and the connection he made to the story when I said the child traveling down the rainbow bridge was named Reece.
I had an interesting conversation with Reece about the rainbow bridge, and was amazed, yet again, at the matter of factness of children.
Reece: Will I ever walk the rainbow bridge again?
Me: Yes, one day.
Reece: When?
Me: When you die.
Reece (thinking for a minute): Does everyone walk the rainbow bridge?
Me: Yes, when they are born, and when they die.
Reece: Will you?
Me: Yes. And so will daddy. We will most likely walk the rainbow bridge before you, but whoever goes first will wait for the rest of our family on the other side. (I was holding back a few tears here)
Reece: Who do you think will go first?
Me: I am not sure.
Reece: I think daddy will.
And with that I smiled, with tears in my eyes. This was our first conversation about death. There was no more to say, no need to make him understand death and the finality of it. Simple questions were asked, and simple answers given.
My youngest from time to time asks about death and I find the Rainbow Bridge story a good one. Now that we are studying Norse Mythology they love it even more. ;)
ReplyDeleteIt is such a great representation for them, and one I know he understood.
DeleteI can't wait to get to Norse Mythology.
What a beautiful conversation, and so very profound. It's amazing how kids come so easily to things isn't it? I have found this to be the case with my girls too and it's such a blessing to watch it all unfold. xo
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing Shel. They have no past reference which makes it so easy for them to see it in this matter of fact way.
DeleteI feel hugely blessed to be witnessing all of this unfold. xo
my that is such a tough topic and emotional as well. I think being honest and just answering the questions as simply as possible is the best. Looks like Reece was satisfied. I got teared up reading this post.
ReplyDeleteIt is, and can be. I was happy he asked in context with the story, it was perfect timing really.
DeleteThat pinched my heart a bit...what a beautiful way of speaking about death Kim. So sensitive and sweet.
ReplyDeleteThank you my friend. xo
Deletewhat a beautiful way to talk about death, i love the idea of walking over a rainbow !... ours took place after our hamster passed, which was very emotional. thanks for sharing this...
ReplyDeleteThank you. It is a beautiful way to think of it, and something he understands right now. Yes, death of animals is often when these things come up. We have lost two dogs, a cat and three chickens since Reece was born, but I think with the dogs he was too young, and the cat and chickens sort of wondered off our property never to be seen again. So he likes to think they are still roaming around in the woods :)
DeleteThis brought tears to my eyes. Death is a part of life, but such a hard subject to talk about. I like how you approach this Kim and it is something I will remember.
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to talk about, but I was happy he asked in the context of this story, it kinda just all came together perfectly.
DeleteThank you Tracey. xo
Such a hard topic to discuss. Brings tears to my eyes too.
ReplyDeletePhoebe just asked me about death the other day, and if when we die if that means if we are gone forever. I wasn't sure exactly what to say or how to approach it, as 3 is so young for these words.....
Three is young, I think even Reece at almost six is a bit young to totally understand. But he really seemed to grasp the rainbow bridge, or at least it gave him enough of an answer that he was satisfied.
DeleteI am so moved by what you wrote. A really beautiful way to explain death..simple and clear. Looks like Reece found in it all the explaination he needs.
ReplyDeleteYes, the open mind with which children converse about this topic is refreshing. Talking about the reasons and what happens afterwards usually carries the conversation further. But I have also realized how important it is to keep things clear and simple and that very often that is just enough for the moment.
ReplyDeleteIt is refreshing. And I agree, clear and simple is often all they need and want. I tend to follow his lead, let him ask questions, and then give very simple answers. If he wants more, he keeps asking and then we go deeper. It seems to work for both of us right now.
DeleteTears on this end too. It's amazing how connected they stay to it all when they are allowed the space for childhood.
ReplyDeleteOur oldest son was once talking about a dear friend of our daughter's that lives a few blocks away. He was determined that the two girls had traveled together to earth on the rainbow bridge, that they were supposed to be sisters, but that they couldn't find one family where they both could live. That's why they picked two families that live so close together--so they could still be sisters.
Thank you so much for sharing such an intimate moment.
YES! It has been my hope that I have created a life that allows Reece to have a real childhood, and when things like this happen it confirms that I am on the right path.
DeleteThat is some wonderful insight from your son. Wow!
Thank you for reading. xo
Beautiful! Thanks for sharing Kim! <3
ReplyDeleteThanks Tiffany. xo
DeleteI love this idea, such a wonderful way to approach a topic that could be so scary. And so simple. I've needed some good guidance, thank you!
ReplyDeleteYou are very welcome. Happy it could help.
DeleteThank you for sharing... My daughter asked a while back, it all started with our betta fish dying. We have a slightly different dialogue in Tao, but essentially the same. Through lives we stay close to the people we are meant to cycle with until we stop with the cycle of death and rebirth. Through our cultivation, we help the people that will come and the people that have come before. Children choose their parents and we keep each other close. Death is only a short goodbye. The soul lives on forever. We give kids too little credit... they are much wiser than we could ever imagine!
ReplyDeleteMy pleasure Yanic. Yes, the rainbow bridge birthday story is about the child choosing his/her parents too. It really is beautiful.
DeleteThey are much wiser than we know, we just need to give the time and space to show us :) Reece is on old soul, always has been, and it makes me smile just thinking about it.
Tears here too. I find that I have the most intense conversations with my children.
ReplyDeleteThey are pretty awesome people to chat with :)
DeleteYou can't beat the innocence of kids eh?
ReplyDeleteI like your rainbow bridge story. It's kind of a challenge for families, like mine that are not religious, to try and explain our after life beliefs...especially if I'm still a bit unsure myself.
You can't. Thanks, it is a wonderful story. I can understand that challenge, I don't necessarily consider us religious, but I do consider us spiritual, if that makes sense. We don't practice a particular religion.
DeleteThis is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing, Kim. This made me shed a few tears to. A hard lesson, beautifully tended to. Well done Mamma Bear.
ReplyDeleteThank you. That means a lot coming from you. xo
DeleteWow, what a sweet, special story. He is such a neat kid, your Reece.
ReplyDeleteThank you Summer, I think he is pretty neat too :)
Deletexo
I'm so glad your conversation went so well. It's still a very difficult subject area here with Maria :(
ReplyDeleteIt such a tough one. I am sorry it is still tough going with Maria. Have you read the story of the rainbow bridge to her. Maybe it will help, and give her something more tangible in her mind's eye.
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